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Leche Podrida Para Disfrutar

Zine of the Gay

cover spread of Mala Leche #1Mala Leche Vol. 1, curated and edited by Eduardo Aparicio and Herculito Tropical, published February 1992 is zine from Chicago dripping in excess of satire and authentic latine queer play. In this fully Spanish resvista antiestica, “antiaesthetic magazine,” unfolds a collection of writings that enraptured me in nostalgia and warmth of the kind of queer exchange that occurs in latine kinship. A mixture of confessionals, stories, cultural analysis, an avant-garde interview, lesbianfied reworked novels, and your monthly horoscope. I could walk you through the marvels of these slaps in the face that leave you grinning with a red mark on your face or I could simply translate for you. We have the opening statement:

text block in spanish “What does “BAD MILK” mean? MALA LECHE* is a discursive violence. It is that discourse reduced to a monologue that wants to be made heard. It’s what comes out of us because if it doesn’t, we explode. Our mission is to express our vision of actuality with a squirt of MALA LECHE. Signed: Eduardo Aparicio and Herculito Tropical.”

*Leche (milk) is a common slang for semen, cum, and various sexual secretions. So this leche? Has gone baddddd


The first story is titled Mi primero experencia, “My first experience,” by Erudito Alavio Leta. Details snapshots of first queer experiences and moments from when they were a young boy and “multiplying experiences.” Small windows of his experiences as a young gay man, moments that seem that have stuck to him like glue. One as young as 8 years old: “I still remember the sensation leaving with slippery cheeks.” Sincere in tone, these stories amounted to the specific experience of working at a clothing store in the luxury women’s clothing section. A male client who he was familiar with came in one day to shop “for” his wife and asked to try on the dresses himself in front of Erudito.

El cogio un vestido, se fue al cuarto de pruebas y salĂ­a sin zapatos, con las patasas todas pelĂșas, caminando como si tuviera tacones bien altos, paseandose por delante de los espejos, mirĂĄndose por delante y por detrĂĄs, que ni Bette Davis le hacĂ­a la competencia.

“He grabbed a dress, and went to the dressing room and left without shoes, with totally hairy steps, walking as if with very high heels, strolling in front of the mirrors, looking at himself from the front and from behind, not even Bette Davis could compete.”

Ultimately we are left in a cliffhanger: ÂżQuĂ© influencia tuvo esto en mi? En la prĂłxima les contarĂ©. “What influence did this have on me? In the next one, I will tell you all.” We are left wondering if this exchange continued, if not then how does Erudito walk away after this?

The following story titled COMIENDO MIERDA DESDE TEMPRANO, “EATING SHIT SINCE EARLY” by Mochito Cienfuegos, also leaves us an accidental cliffhanger. The story is missing its final page, but we are left at the beginning of a raunchy detailing of a night out at “AN ULTIMATE LEATHER BAR.” Mochito addresses the shiteaters directly, that may be the reader: you, me, us; or someone else entirely. The aggressive warm, from the heat of the branding iron they have as teeth, welcome they give us in the dedication tells us all:

Estos versos escotolĂłgicos y comemierda se los dedico o los que en un momento u otro se me han cagado en la madre. Con sentimiento y sabor caguense en lo suyo.

“I dedicate to you all these scotological and shit-eating verses or to those that in one moment or the other have shat on their mother. With sentiment and taste, shit on yourselves.”

The teeth of this tone leaves you with (skid?)marks all over your body, slightly infectious too since it is definitely not sanitary, but you leave with a smile of laughter because you liked it.

The following section told me how truly this zine was made by Latines for Latines. Because if it was by and for anyone else it would make me question how the hell they got this niche information from! And what is that information? That circumcision is an unheard-of practice in Latinoamerica
 which leads to this highly specific investigation on classifieds. ÂżQuiĂ©n es esa persona que te busca? “Who is that person that searches for you?” by Cheito Chupaman is an uncovering of advertisements and announcements that have been received by Mala Leche to distribute to the community classified style. This “report” starts with a “personal classified” that was sent to Mala Leche specifically about a white American in search of a “serious and affectionate Hispanic man.”hand written text block in spanish

This leads to a question of these types of classifieds. ChupamĂĄn searches and finds examples of these types of classifieds in various magazines.

Se me ocurre preguntarme si los gays estadounidenses que leen es tas publicaciones consideran que estas tienen lectores latinos que encontraran esos anuncios. A continuaciĂłn te informo dĂłnde fue que encontre anuncios de hombres que buscan latinos y te doy algunos ejemplos, para que tengas una idea.

“It occured me to ask myself if American gays that read these publications consider that they have latino readers that finds these announcements. Following I inform you where did I find these announcements of men looking for latinos and give you examples, so you have an idea.”

personal ads

To much of my amusement, the conclusion to this incessant search for latino men by american gays is that latino gays are not circumcised so: Muchos de estos hombres sienten una fascinación por hombres que no sufrieron esta operación al nacer. “Many of these men feel a fascination for men that did not suffer this operation at birth.”

Following this, we have a switch-up to an anti-academic visual culture essay analyzing the convergence and queer dialectic exchange between a billboard advertisement and graffiti surrounding it. Los languages de violencia, “The Languages of Violences” by una chica de Puerto Rico que ama a otra chica, “a girl from Puerto Rico that loves another girl” is an extremely intelligent and riveting queer theoretical essay using this image as a point of origin:

billboard on graffiti covered wallLa imagen que tenemos a nuestra vista es, entonces, la de una tensiĂłn que supera las dinĂĄmicas internas del cartel. El cartel invita a la transgresiĂłn pero opera desde una impostura. Mientras el graffito es en efecto la expresiĂłn de una letra que circula por el espacio de lo ilegal y lo prohibido, el cartel delimita con severidad su inclusiĂłn dentro de la ley.

“Then, the image that we have in our view is one of tension that surpasses the dynamics inside the billboard. The billboard invites a transgression but operates from an imposture. While the graffiti is effectively the expression of a letter circulating through the space of illegality and the prohibited, the billboard severely delimits its inclusion inside the law.”

She details how the graffiti and the billboard are in conversation, the wall being a space of metaphor for this play. She materializes in full animacy the graffiti, the wall, and the billboard. The power to enlarge the gaze of the viewer to understand the dialectic exchanges occurring queers the gaze towards this conversation, passing beyond the legal bounds of marketing.

El cartel, impenitente, abraza al graffito como a un hermano, cual un Judas, insistiéndole participar en la orgia de violencia y poder en la que soñandamente se homologan. Sin un dejo de compasión, le urge imperativamente que desvista a ese cuerpo inerte, a ese cuerpo sin voluntad propia, a ese cuerpo cifra de su poder, a ese cuerpo que le permitira saborear uno y cada uno de esos falitos erectos que se avisoran en la cajetilla ya abierta. Le urge que desgarre esa resistencia aparente, que se imponga sobre ese metal que cede ante la imponente voluntad de un dedo. Esa cosa/caja femenina que es sólo un pretexto y nada mas. Que desvista a esa cosa femenina. A esa cosa femenina.

“The billboard, impenitent, embraces the graffiti like a brother, like a Judas, insisting participation in the orgy of violence and power in which they dream of homologating themselves. Without a hint of compassion, urges him imperatively to undress that inert body, that body without any will of its own, that body that is the cipher of his power, that body that will allow him to savor each and every one of those erect phalluses that can be glimpsed in the already opened pack. Urging to tear that apparent resistance, to impose on that metal that yields to the imposing will of a finger. That feminine thing/box that is only a pretext and nothing more. To undress that feminine thing. That feminine thing.”

There is a strong eroticism to the exchange of seduction past the limits of gender, in the transgression of objects past their subjection. The graffiti is part of the announcement navigating past the lines of dress and undress, simulating fragmented and unfragmented lines of legality and gender. Announcing the tempting act of undressing, a feminine act, a phallus object of the cigarette, not only announces loudly the transgression of gender but does so by animating an object, inherently a queering: to humanize the sentient subject that has become dehumanized. Through the scope of enlarging and transsizing the viewer’s gaze to observe past lines of legality to a dialectical method of transgression. This small but transizable essay by A Girl From Puerto Rico That Loves Another Girl* is poetic and nasty in its intelligence. An invigorating read and leaves you sullied in its chokehold of argument. This essay left me in a state of electricity, in it capacity to witness through a language of a caliber that is high-intellect but anti-academic, inspiring in its unwavering poeticism but grounded in quotidian queer language.

*Si me escuchas, chica de Puerto Rico que ama a otra chica: buscame. Al menos una amistad, te ruego. 

Circulating back to parts of this zine that are under the category that amazed me in its particularity of inner community specifics. This blog post is not an analysis or criticism of the dynamics of immigrants by any means, nor do I mean to start a diaspora war Olympics, but it is a fresh air to be reading something made in the U.S. that feels like something that did not have the U.S. in mind as part of its audience even though it was made in Chicago. This is rare. We immigrants, and many of those who have been here for a long time and/or past generations, tend to subscribe to living under the gaze of whiteness and Americanness to be able to be understood. I am not immune to this: out of survival we learn to code switch, only pay attention, and make known and salient parts of our culture, voice, and way of being, that white people already know or are comfortable with. Not erase but we simply do not water the particularities of ourselves, the untranslatable parts. This zine is littered and glittered with specifics that I could never translate for you, and I would be lying if I said that doesn’t make me happy. To read something that reminds me of home, but in a queer way?! Ways of being that go past slang, ways of song that are innately part of the way we speak. Even simple and small things like the difference between American versus Estadounidense. In Latinoamerica, we do not call people from the U.S. “American” because “America” is also Latin-america. We use “estadounidense” because that is the name of this country, is it not? I have always found it incredibly ironic and telling on the centrism of this country that there is not even an English word to refer to “estadounidense,” only “American.” That is nothing here nor there but even Spanish writing in the U.S., I have seen this exactly translated! To “Americano” instead of “estadounidense”… small things like that tell me your audience is only within the borders of this country to be able to understand this. This zine is very evident, from the first couple of pages, that is not this. I know this was all done in the affect and mindset of us by us for us. The following section is the most evident and beautiful transgression of this though.

The first couple of pages of Tetas Postizas, “Artificial Tits” by Herculito Tropical, is an interview with Kitty, whom I assume is a transformista and/or drag queen. I say assume because the first couple of pages are missing, but somehow this accidental mishap adds to the boundless close culture practice of it all. I will not be translating the entirety of the interview because it is antithetical to the most wondrous thing about it: its untranslatability.

interview text block

Kitty is from Ecuador but grew up in Puerto Rico and is detailing her life as a transformista in the U.S., starting off by saying she wants to give back to her community with competitions such as “Miss Gay Latina International”, “Miss Northside”, “Miss Hispanidad”, and “Miss Southside.” She is talking about her life, childhood, future, hopes, likes, dislikes, and even love life.

Antes eramos muchachos que nos quitabamos la peluca, los brazieres, y ese era el termino del espectaculo de todo transformista. Ahora tu sabes que no, que hay el silicon, hay la hormona, hay el cache, la bisturí, las jaladas de los pellejos, tu sabes

“We were guys before that would take our wigs off, our bras, and there would end the spectacle of everything transformista [even this context: drag, but could mean trans]. Now you know that isn’t the case, there is silicone, there’s hormones, there’s the cache, the scalpel, the skin tuck, you know
”

The conversation is very comfortable and fluid, and innately Caribbean. She ends with a beautiful note that speaks to many queer Caribeños, including myself:

interview text block“Well I haven’t mentioned it, but in the future, maybe in 92’, this year I hope to open my own place. First, I believe in God; secondly, in my father ObatalĂĄ, and my mother OchĂșn. If they give it to me, what I want this year, I will open a transformista club for Latinos.”

In the Caribbean, God is
 God but in conversation with the seven potencias, Kitty highlights two: Yoruba Orishas ObatalĂĄ of creation and OchĂșn of water and fertility. Being in the archive and reading the hopes and ideas of the future by people in these zines makes me feel like they are in conversation with me. I hold the heavy weight of representing the future for them as I stand in the present they speak of in futurity. I do not know if this came to fruition, if they granted the club to Kitty, but I hope so dearly.

Aside from the wonderful actual text and narrative of this interview, what is so enlightening is the interview questions themselves. If you haven’t noticed you can see that Herculito (Little  Hercules but also a pun for “Her-little ass”) says questions such as “¿BlablablĂĄ, bablĂĄ?”, “¿Fuiqui fuiqui cucĂș?”, “¿FifĂ­ fofĂł o fufĂș?” This could be read as a gag and a subversion of interview questions, simply making fun of interview styles and queering it all. Maybe they did use questions with formal and clear sentences and then switched them out to these fun alternative questions. However, I believe differently. Latinos, especially in the Caribbean speak often in sounds. I frankly don’t have many ways to explain it other than it is highly contextual and musical sounds that can be understood in colloquial conversation but are untranslatable. The equivalent of humming sounds that indicate “yes” or “no” but instead with full onomatopoeia sentences that are sung in conversation can mean full moods, opinions, directions, thoughts, emotions, etc. Orchestrated on actual sound, rhythm, and application, showcasing their meaning. Granted this is not often written out because it is an overwhelmingly orally dependent tradition, but this interview changes that. Queers a Latino tradition by making it even more opaque on the page. You could argue that this was still in replacement of actual questions, but I would like to live in the fantasy of this conversation being comprised of this oral echo of culture. What adds to it is that it does make sense. Reading it out loud, those are the correct sounds for the types of sound-questions that were asked according to their answers.

Additionally, the phonic echos of this tropicalia elevate Kitty and her presence. The best interviews are those of conversation and exchange of kinship, where there is a vulnerability braided through the interchange of human connection rather than interrogation. The side of the blade that cuts in this case can be that then the interviewer can overpower the interviewee, at the end of the day I want to know about Kitty. By queering the interview style with a queering of these cultural phonic echos into the zine, Kitty’s words are heightened and bright by simultaneously still maintaining the affective presence of Herculito with the sound of his voice. She does not blend into the background but reigns on the throne constructed by the wounds of home. Everyone is present and sensorially opaque past and through a multiplicity of dimensions. And just like that, taquití táka tá.

illustration of a woman hiking up her skirt and showing her ankle

Lastly, we end in finales to magazines and newspapers that I deeply miss and should be brought back: horoscopes. In the camp and queer tradition of the beloved Walter Mercado, Doña Masas Los GuĂ­a y Los Revienta
, “Doña Masa Guides and Blow You Up
”  is not your average astrological reading but a reading. This horoscope reading is provided to you by “The artificial satellites of Doña Masas and her ensemble ‘The Astrologists’”. This horoscope is messy, kitschy, shady, and more. Dripping in slang and particularities, it was everything and more to read. Doña Masas does not tell you what you want to hear but what will set you straight and leave your mouth agape. For example, Sagittarius:

text block

“Sagittarius: Generous, beautiful, the big whores of the Plaza [a pun, and also euphemism in this context for the streets], I mean, of the Zodiac.  No other sign is more faggotty, more scatological
 I mean, they talk and eat so much, but so much shit that they have continual verbal diarrhea. This month, not even an exaggerated dosage of Peptobismal saves y’all.”

I highly urge you to read your horoscope if you are Spanish-speaking and get some humbling laughs. I leave you in celebration of Aries season with this translation:

text block

“Aries: How are you all behaving, crazy spider women? Well, the truth is I don’t know because Jupiter is parked in front of Mercury and he, damn annoying, doesn’t let me see anything. Arieans are so gray, so uninteresting, that regardless, I don’t care.”

Valeria is interning at QZAP this semester. She is in her senior year at University of Wisconsin-Madison studying Gender & Women’s Studies. She was born and raised in Valencia, Venezuela and now lives in Teejop land (Madison, WI).

Menstruaciones No Binarias part 2: Interview with Rebeldia Menstrual and ErĂłticas Fluidas

Zine of the GayWhen I first came across Menstruaciones No Binarias, I was immediately struck by its depth, its urgency, and its commitment to dismantling the normative narratives surrounding menstruation. After writing about the zine in my last blog post, I knew I wanted to go further—to hear directly from the voices behind this work. In this post, I am honored to share an interview with Nachi of Rebeldía Menstrual and Andre of Eróticas Fluidas, the brilliant minds who collaborated to create this transformative text. Their insights shed light on the importance of reclaiming menstruation as a political act, the challenges of crafting inclusive language, and the ongoing fight for trans and nonbinary menstrual justice. Because language and accessibility are central to our shared mission, I have translated our conversation from Spanish to English while keeping both versions in this post. I hope that, through their words, you feel the same sense of empowerment, resistance, and possibility that this zine so powerfully conveys.

Menstruaciones no binarias

Valeria: Which key moment or experience motivated the creation of a zine that questions the binaries surrounding menstruation?

Nachi & Andre: The key experience that motivated us to create the zine was finding ourselves in the dilemma that the majority of the available materials about menstruation are made, thought of, and directed by and from ciswomen towards ciswomen, leading to aside all menstruating living experiences of sexual and gender dissidents. Finding ourselves with that profoundly essentialist, biologically deterministic, and cisheteronormative reality made us unite our projects and create this zine together.

V: Sexual health and menstrual experience are also mentioned as political acts in the zine. How do you both see this position’s impact on the fight for rights for trans and nonbinary people?

N & A: We think that the most significant impact is amplifying the vision that we understand for the rights of trans people beyond identity, together with the visualization that there are many possible experiences when we talk about menstruation and ovum-menstrual cycles. We say it is a political act due to permitting us to amplify the imagination about the possibilities of menstruation, particularly concerning people of different sexualities and/or genders.

V: The zine stands out for its inclusive and accessible language. How did you both confront the defiance to create material that could resonate with many identities and diverse experiences?

N & A: This was one of the purposes of creating the zine, amplifying the forms of access to the knowledge from our situated experience. That is how it converted itself to grand defiance with the language used since the exact intention is to amplify the experiences, not reduce them. Besides, we wrote the zine from our own sexual dissident voices, and this reveals a specific sensibility in the hour of investigation on how to choose to explain it and address the topics.

V: You talk of the pathologization of menstruation in medical and social discourse. What changes do you think are necessary in the health system to address menstruating experiences in a more inclusive manner?

N & A: Firstly, we think that the whole health system should be transformed, and that would implicate reformulating the notion of health/illness. If we specifically speak about the topic of menstruation, the topic of gender identities would be urgent. As such, in the professional health practices and the community actions of sexual health approach, but also in public politics that should repair within the lives of sexual and/or gender dissident people. If we dream of changes, we could talk about generating a vision of a comprehensive reality, not just bio-deterministic about people.

V: How do you both perceive the impact of international distribution networks in the diffusion of projects such as this zine? And what challenges or benefits do you consider that bring forth these global links?

N & A: In the case of distribution networks found in Chile, Mexico, and Argentina, having an impact that, through our own efforts, we couldn’t have achieved. There lies the importance of international networks to diffuse projects and trespassing borders. Part of the benefits has been having a larger impact on international communities, amplifying to readers the material and receiving feedback on contexts that aren’t our own, and then enriching the prior reflections of the publication.

V: The zine mixes with theory, personal experience, and practice. How did you balance these perspectives, and what role does each have in the final narrative of the zine?

N & A: We both made common contributions; we wanted to share information in an accessible form, which is typically in a very medical and academic language, and at the same time, share reflections on our own terms. We did the whole process of investigating, writing, and creating the zine together. Each of us indeed has expertise due to our professional and biographical journeys. Rebeldia Menstrual approaches the hormonal processes, the ovum-menstrual cycle, menstrual hygiene, and others from this project. ErĂłticas Fluidas approached the critical vision and the political position around sexual and affective education that we want to construct.

V: What are the origins of “RebeldĂ­a Menstrual” and “ErĂłticas Fluidas”? From your experiences and perspectives, how did these personal projects surge? And what motivated you both to develop them?

eroticas fluidas rebeldia menstrualAndre: ErĂłticas Fluidas surged in 2020 as a self-managed project where I sold sex toys and articles for sexual pleasure. This is how the focus quickly shifted towards autonomous research, the publication of zines, participation in podcasts, and the creation of various workshops related to sexual and emotional education from a sexually dissident and critical perspective. The motivation for developing the project was and continues to be deeply rooted in a strong conviction that erotic and epistemic justice lies within ourselves, and that through these lived experiences, we can reduce the harm that most sexually and/or gender-dissident people are exposed to.

Nachi: RebeldĂ­a Menstrual has its origins in 2017, the same year I discovered the menstrual cup and was in my fourth year of studying Obstetrics. Reaching that point in my life and discovering how the menstrual cup was transforming my menstrual experience and the way I understood my vulva, vagina, uterus, and menstruation was a revelation. I thought, more people need to know about the menstrual cup and deserve to know themselves in this way. So, I created a page and started distributing menstrual cups. Through the internet and by participating in various fairs, I began selling cups. Over the years, I expanded to selling menstrual underwear, cloth pads, menstrual discs, and in recent years, even zines. From the very beginning, my goal was always to make information accessible to people. Selling products was just the excuse and a way to bring a bit of economic sustainability to the project.

V: Could you share more about the methodologies you use when creating your zines, from conceptualization to the final design, and how you integrate artistic creativity into the process?

N & A: Our methodology is quite artisanal and improvised; we don’t follow formal investigative design processes. Instead, we focused on making a critical compilation of the available material and developing our own ideas about what we wanted to express. This process took us about two years (and was carried out remotely due to the pandemic) to finalize the design virtually. During this time, the illustrator Alineandome joined the project to handle the layout and illustrations for the final zine. Artistic creativity is contributed by everyone involved in the project.

V: In addition to “Menstruaciones No Binarias”, what other projects have you been developing recently, and how do they relate to or expand on the topics covered in this zine?

N & A: We have dreamed of transforming the zine into a workshop, where we can engage in lived, experiential dialogue with people and share the information in other formats, not just through reading. This is a pending project that we hope to bring to life in the future.

V: Finally, what hopes do you have for this zine in the future? How do you envision its impact on international communities, especially in queer and non-binary spaces?

N & A: Our hopes for the zine are that it continues to travel through sexually and/or gender-dissident communities across the world wherever it can reach. This is why the material is open for distribution and available to be sold and shared by anyone who gets in touch with us.

∇Δ∇Δ∇Δ

Valeria: ÂżCuĂĄl fue el momento o experiencia clave que les motivĂł a crear un zine que cuestionara los binarismos en torno a la menstruaciĂłn?

Nachi & Andre: La experiencia clave que nos motivó a crear el fanzine fue encontrarnos en la disyuntiva de que la mayoria de los materiales disponibles acerca de menstruación estån hechos, pensados y dirigidos por y desde mujeres cis a mujeres cis, dejåndo de lado toda la vivencia menstruante de las disidencias sexuales y de género. Encontrarnos con esta realidad profundamente esencialista, biologicista y heterocisnormada nos hizo unir nuestros proyectos y crear juntes este fanzine.

V: En el fanzine mencionan que la salud sexual y la experiencia menstruante son también actos políticos. ¿Cómo ven el impacto de este posicionamiento en la lucha por los derechos de personas trans y no binarias?

N & A: Creemos que el mayor impacto es ampliar la visión de lo que entendemos por los derechos de las personas trans y no binarias mås allå de la identidad, junto con visibilizar que hay muchas experiencias posibles cuando hablamos de menstruación y ciclos óvulo-menstruales. Decimos que es un acto político ya que nos permite ampliar el imaginario acerca de las posibilidades de la menstruación, particularmente en relación a personas disidentes sexuales y/o de género.

V: El fanzine se destaca por su lenguaje inclusivo y accesible. ÂżCĂłmo enfrentaron el desafĂ­o de crear un material que pudiera resonar con tantas identidades y experiencias diversas?

N & A: Este era uno de los propĂłsitos al crear el fanzine, ampliar las formas de acceder al conocimiento desde nuestra experiencia situada. AsĂ­ fue como se convirtiĂł en un gran desafĂ­o lo del lenguaje usado, ya que justamente la intenciĂłn es amplificar las experiencias, no reducirlas. AdemĂĄs, escribimos el fanzine desde nuestras propias voces disidentes sexuales y eso devela una sensibilidad especĂ­fica a la hora de investigar y elegir cĂłmo se explican y abordan los temas.

V: Hablan de la patologización de la menstruación en discursos médicos y sociales. ¿Qué cambios creen que son necesarios en los sistemas de salud para abordar de manera mås inclusiva las experiencias menstruantes?

N & A: En principio creemos que todo el sistema de salud deberĂ­a transformarse y eso implicarĂ­a reformular la nociĂłn de salud/enfermedad. Si hablamos especĂ­ficamente del tema de la menstruaciĂłn, serĂ­an urgentes los cambios en temĂĄticas de identidades de gĂ©nero. AsĂ­ como en las prĂĄcticas de los profesionales de salud, en las acciones comunitarias para el abordaje de la salud sexual, pero tambiĂ©n en polĂ­ticas pĂșblicas que reparen en las vidas de las personas disidentes sexuales y/o de gĂ©nero. Si soñamos con cambios, podrĂ­amos hablar de generar una visiĂłn que realmente sea integral y no sĂłlo biologicista acerca de las personas.

V: ¿Cómo perciben el impacto de las redes de distribución internacionales en la difusión de proyectos como este zine, y qué retos o beneficios consideran que trae consigo este alcance global?

N & A: En este caso las redes de distribuciĂłn se encuentran en Chile, MĂ©xico y Argentina, teniendo un impacto que por nuestro propio esfuerzo no lograrĂ­amos. AllĂ­ es donde radica la importancia de las redes internacionales para difundir los proyectos y que traspasen fronteras por sĂ­ solos. Parte de los beneficios ha sido tener impacto en comunidades internacionales, ampliar a les lectores del material y recibir retroalimentaciones de contextos que no son el nuestro y eso enriquece muchĂ­simo las reflexiones posteriores a la publicaciĂłn.

V: El zine mezcla teoría, experiencia personal y pråctica. ¿Cómo equilibraron estas perspectivas y qué rol tuvo cada una en la narrativa final del fanzine?

N & A: Ambes hicimos aportaciones comunes, queríamos compartir información de una forma accesible, que normalmente estå en un lenguaje muy médico y academicista y al mismo tiempo compartir reflexiones en nuestros propios términos. Si bien todo el proceso de investigación, escritura y creación del fanzine fue en conjunto, es cierto que cada une tiene su expertiz por su recorrido profesional y biogråfico. Desde el proyecto Rebeldía Menstrual se aportó sobre los procesos hormonales, el ciclo óvulo-menstrual, la gestión menstrual, entre otros. Y desde el proyecto Eróticas Fluidas se aportó sobre la visión crítica y el posicionamiento político en torno a la educación sexual y afectiva que queremos construir.

V: ÂżCuĂĄles son los orĂ­genes de “RebeldĂ­a Menstrual” y “ErĂłticas Fluidas”? ÂżCĂłmo surgieron estos proyectos personales y quĂ© los motivĂł a desarrollarlos desde sus experiencias y perspectivas?

Andre: Eróticas Fluidas surge en el 2020 como un proyecto autogestivo donde vendía juguetes sexuales y artículos para el placer sexual. Así fue como råpidamente el eje giró hacia la investigación autonóma, la publicación de fanzines, la participación en podcasts y la creación de diversos talleres relacionados a la educación sexual y afectiva con perspectiva disidente sexual y crítica. La motivación de desarrollar el proyecto tuvo y tiene que ver con una fuerte convicción de que la justicia erótica y epistémica estå en nosotres mismes y que a través de esas vivencias podemos reducir el daño al que nos vemos expuestes la mayoría de personas disidentes sexuales y/o de género.

Nachi: Rebeldia Menstrual tiene sus inicios en el 2017, el mismo año en que descubrĂ­ la copa menstrual en mi vida y que estaba cursando 4 año de la carrera de Obstetricia, llegar a ese punto de mi vida y descubrir como la copa menstrual estaba transformando mi experiencia menstrual y la forma que tenĂ­a de conocer mi vulva, vagina, Ăștero y menstruaciĂłn fue una revelaciĂłn, pensĂ© que mĂĄs personas tienen que conocer la copa y merecian conocerse asĂ­ mismas, asi cree una pĂĄgina y comencĂ© a distribuir copas menstruales, a travĂ©s de internet o participando en distintas ferias comencĂ© a vender copas, con los años lleguĂ© a vender calzones menstruales, toallas de tela, discos menstruales y tambiĂ©n los fanzines estos Ășltimos años. Mi objetivo desde un inicio siempre fue poder acercar la informaciĂłn a las personas, el vender productos era la excusa y la forma de poder darle un poco de sustentabilidad econĂłmica al proyecto.

V: ¿Podrían compartir mås sobre las metodologías que emplean al crear sus fanzines, desde la conceptualización hasta el diseño final, y cómo integran la creatividad artística en el proceso?

N & A: Nuestra metodología es bastante artesanal e improvisada, no nos guíamos por diseños investigativos formales sino que fuimos mås bien haciendo una recopilación crítica del material disponible y una elaboración propia acerca de lo que queríamos decir. Así fue como nos tomamos aproximadamente dos años (y a la distancia producto de la pandemia) en crear el diseño final de forma virtual y donde se sumó la ilustradora Alineandome para la diagramación e ilustraciones del fanzine final. La creatividad artística es propuesta por todas las personas involucradas en el proyecto.

V: AdemĂĄs de “Menstruaciones No Binarias”, ÂżquĂ© otros proyectos han estado desarrollando recientemente, y cĂłmo se relacionan o expanden los temas tratados en este fanzine?

N & A: Hemos soñado en convertir el fanzine en un taller, donde podamos dialogar vivencialmente con las personas y abrir la información en otros formatos, no sólo de lectura. Este es un proyecto pendiente que esperamos llevar a cabo en el futuro.

V: Finalmente, ¿qué esperanzas tienen para este fanzine en el futuro? ¿Cómo visualizan su impacto en las comunidades internacionales, especialmente en espacios queer y no binarios?

N & A: Las esperanzas ligadas al fanzine es que siga viajando por comunidades disidentes sexuales y/o de género de todas las partes del mundo al que pueda llegar, es por esto que el material estå abierto para distribución y disponible para ser vendido y difundido por cualquier persona que se ponga en contacto con nosotres.

Valeria is interning at QZAP this semester. She is in her senior year at University of Wisconsin-Madison studying Gender & Women’s Studies. She was born and raised in Valencia, Venezuela and now lives in Teejop land (Madison, WI).

Menstruaciones No Binarias: Your Body is Not Your Enemy, the Dominant Narrative is

Zine of the Gay

The zine Menstruaciones No Binarias, published in collaboration by RebeldĂ­a Menstrual and ErĂłticas Fluidas, is a groundbreaking text that dismantles normative narratives about menstruation. This work redefines the experience of menstruating as a site of critical engagement, inclusivity, and autonomy.

Menstruaciones No Binarias front cover
(All photo credits: @eroticasfluidas and @rebeldiamenstrual on instagram)

With its visually striking design and theoretically rich content, this zine offers an alternative view to the biomedical and capitalist frameworks that often dominate the menstrual discourse.

The zine is originally in Spanish, so I went ahead and translated key quotes for this post. The English translations are included in the footnotes; in my translation practice I believe in adding the original text within the body of writing and the translation secondary rather than vice-versa to attempt to decenter Anglo-phone literary frameworks in comparative writing through the form of the text.

The authors of Menstruaciones No Binarias are Rebeldía Menstrual, represented by Nachi (she/they), a nonbinary lesbian and sexual health worker from Mexico, and Eróticas Fluidas, a self-managed project led by Andre, a transfeminist lesbian psychologist and advocate for survivors of violence from Chile. The creators describe their work as “una larga y sentida investigación”1 that questions the implicit binarisms of health and illness, advocating instead for a paradigm that recognizes the diversity of menstruating bodies. As stated in the zine, “Desde ese lugar confluimos, ponemos nuestra energia para que esto se expanda y seguir dialogando con otras experiencias menstruantes. Confiamos en que otro mundo es posible a partir de las practicas de descubrimiento del cuerpo y con ello la rotura de mitos sobre la menstruación, considerando la singularidad de cada cuerpo.”2 (pg. 2).

hands holding open Menstruaciones No BinariasHistorically, menstruation has been shrouded in euphemisms and myths that reinforce heteronormative and cisnormative ideals. On page 5, the authors trace the linguistic roots of menstruation, noting its ties to cycles of the moon and seasonal rites: “Menstruación: de la palabra mens o ‘mes’, del indoeuropeo mehens o ‘luna’ y de la palabra r’tu o ‘estación, rito.’”​3. These etymologies underline how menstruation has been spiritually and socially significant across cultures, yet systematically erased or sanitized in modern discourse.

One of the zine’s central interventions is to politicize menstrual pain. On page 6, the authors propose: “Proponemos comprender el dolor menstrual dentro de una realidad sociopolítica que no otorga oportunidades para habitar un contexto de cuidado y/o que nos permita el descanso.”​4 This reframing shifts responsibility from the individual to societal systems that fail to accommodate the cyclical needs of menstruating bodies.

A recurring theme is the deconstruction of cisnormative assumptions about menstruation. On page 6, the authors challenge the idea that menstruation is inherently tied to womanhood, asking:

 “¿QuĂ© pasarĂ­a si abolimos la idea de que por menstruar nos vamos a convertir en ‘mujeres’? ÂżEn cuĂĄles de esas ideas tenemos espacios otras identidades? ÂżEn cuĂĄles de esos mitos tienen cabida las personas que desean hacer terapia hormonal con testosterona? ÂżEn cuĂĄles de estas ideas tienen valor quienes deciden interrumpir sus menstruaciones por voluntad propia?”5

By foregrounding nonbinary and transgender perspectives, the zine opens a much-needed space for inclusive conversations.

hands holding open Menstruaciones No BinariasThe work goes further to interrogate the medicalization and commodification of menstruation. While it critiques pharmaceutical and capitalist interventions, the zine acknowledges the necessity of these tools for some. This nuanced position allows for diverse approaches to managing menstruation, from herbal remedies to hormonal therapies, while respecting personal autonomy.

One of the zine’s most compelling questions appears on page 35: “¿Como agenciarse colectivamente para vivir menstruaciones dignas?”6​. The authors emphasize the importance of collective care and self-determination in health practices. This micropolitical approach reframes menstruation as not only a personal experience but a communal and political act.

hands holding open Menstruaciones No BinariasThe authors provide a rich theoretical lens through which to view menstruation, connecting it to broader discourses of embodiment, autonomy, and resistance. On page 17, they explore how hormones are part of the “redes de conexion”7 that shape our bodies, highlighting how hormonal processes defy simplistic categorization: “Nuestros vasos sanguínos serían algo así como redes de conexión por donde fluyen las hormonas, que al llegar a diversos lugares pueden generar diversas TRANSFORMACIONES.”8 This view aligns with feminist and queer theories that prioritize fluidity over fixity.

On page 24, the creators assert, “Cada experiencia es un mundo para cada cuerpo, existen tantas formas de vivir estos ciclos, hay tantas experiencias menstruales como cuerpos y personal mesntruantes en el mundo.”9 This statement underscores the zine’s central philosophy: the individuality and diversity of menstruation defy monolithic narratives. Building from this premise, the text challenges the homogenizing tendencies of both medical and cultural discourses, advocating for the acknowledgment of menstruation as a deeply personal yet communal experience. The authors emphasize that no single framework can encompass all menstrual realities, from those shaped by hormone therapies to cultural rituals and individual preferences. This lens aligns with a broader transfeminist critique of binary and reductionist categorizations, inviting a reimagining of menstrual health that is as multifaceted as the bodies and identities that experience it.

hands holding open Menstruaciones No BinariasMy favorite section starts on page 27 titled “El registro menstrual en mis propios tĂ©rminos”.10 The authors introduce a framework they term the “micropolitica menstrual”11 emphasizing self-managed sexual health through practices that empower and demystify menstruation. As they note, “Estos ejercicios son parte de una posible micropolitica menstrual orientada a la autogestiĂłn de la salud sexual.”(pg. 28)12 . This approach challenges biomedical and capitalist norms, instead advocating for autonomy and collective care. The micropolitic encourages individuals to track their cycles through diverse means—whether using lunar diagrams, digital apps, or traditional methods—aiming to deepen personal understanding and reclaim agency over one’s body. By prioritizing such personalized practices, the zine fosters an intimate resistance against systems that historically pathologize or control menstruating bodies, envisioning menstrual self-knowledge as a radical, empowering act.

The zine also addresses the experiences of trans and nonbinary individuals who undergo hormonal therapies, noting that the effects of such treatments vary widely. This attention to diverse experiences emphasizes the individuality of menstrual cycles and the necessity of rejecting one-size-fits-all solutions.

Menstruaciones No Binarias back coverMenstruaciones No Binarias is not just a zine; it is a manifesto for a new politics of menstruation. It invites readers to reimagine their relationships with their bodies and to question societal norms that marginalize and pathologize menstruation. By centering voices that have been historically excluded from menstrual discourse, it charts a path toward greater inclusivity and understanding.

The questions it raises—about care, autonomy, and the intersections of identity and biology—are as urgent as they are transformative. In the spirit of the zine’s call for collective action, this work reminds us that another world is indeed possible, one where all bodies are honored in their singularity and complexity.

  1. “a felt and extensive investigation”↩
  2. “We converge from this place, we put our energy so that this expands and continues a dialogue
    with other menstruating experiences. We trust that another world is possible from the practices of
    the discovery of the body and with it, a rupture of the myths about menstruation, considering the
    singularity of each body.”↩
  3. “Menstruation: of the word mens o ‘mes’, from the Indoeuropean mehens or ‘moon’ and the work ‘r’ito’ or ‘station, ritual.”↩
  4. We propose a comprehension of menstrual pain inside a sociopolitical reality that does not grant opportunities to inhabit a context of care and/or that permits us rest.”↩
  5. “What would happen if we abolished the idea that if we menstruate we will convert ourselves into ‘women’? In which of these ideas do we have space for other identities? In which of those myths is there capacity for the people who wish to have hormone therapy with testosterone? In which of these ideas is there value for the people who decide to interrupt their menstruation out of their own volition?”↩
  6. “How do we create a collective agency to live our menstruations with dignity?”↩
  7. “…networks of connection”↩
  8. “Our blood vessels would be something like networks of connection where hormones flow, that once it arrives in diverse locations it can generate diverse TRANSFORMATIONS.”↩
  9. “Every experience is a world for each body, there exist so many forms of living these cycles, there are as many menstrual experiences as there are bodies and personal menstruatees in the world.”↩
  10. ““The menstrual record in my own terms”↩
  11. “menstrual micropolitic”↩
  12. “These exercises are part of the possible menstrual micropolitic oriented towards autogestation about sexual health.”↩

Valeria is interning at QZAP this semester. She is in her senior year at University of Wisconsin-Madison studying Gender & Women’s Studies. She was born and raised in Valencia, Venezuela and now lives in Teejop land (Madison, WI).

World AIDS Day – 2024

Fight AIDS!! ACT UP KCOn this World AIDS Day I’m thinking about my deceased friends and the power of paper and toner. If there was a number one reason I started making zines in 1992 it was because I got involved with Milwaukee’s chapter of ACT UP. As a bebe queer activist who wanted to teach my peers about better sexual (and overall) health, one of the best ways to communicate in that pre-internet era was through print.

So we did. We made zines and handed out rubbers and flyers with instructions on how to put them on. We talked about sex, and we danced, and we shouted and we put up stickers and wheat pasted and danced more. And we zapped politicians, and pharmaceutical companies, and died in the streets and locked down in offices
 and we danced. And some of us got older, and learned more about harm reduction, and intersectionality, and our queer history, and are able still to dance (sometimes, and maybe in different ways, and still
) And some of us didn’t.

Flyer from the 1992 RNC that says “150,000 Dead from AIDS. Stop This Monster” with picture of president George H.W. Bush.On any given day I mostly don’t care what my boss, or my family of origin and mishpucha, or a bunch of random fundie assholes think about me and what we’re doing here. But I do wonder what these ghosts would say. Would they be proud of us? These queer older siblings who would see that both science and society have come so far, and yet we’re battling the same bigotry – the homo- and trans- and bi-phobia, the same racism and poverty and classism that has allowed this dumb fucking syndrome to fester and spread for 40+ years. Would they be proud of who WE are, this collective of folks who want to preserve this history of print and all of the people whose stories and lives are spilled out among the pages because they taught us that we and our love and our bodies and our pleasure is worth fighting for?

I would like to believe so, but some days I really just don’t know.

xoMilo

Rebel Fux #7: (Post) Election Haze

Zine of the Gay

Rebel Fux #7 coverIn the words of Kate Huh in the issue I want to highlight, in Rebel Fux #7: “Well, I guess this is the election issue.” I am writing this pre-results but by the time this is up we will know who the next president of Amerikkka is. This is a highly political post, but in honor of the Queer Zine Archive Project’s sheer existence, the personal is political. I am sure that many of us, including myself, are going through sociopolitical stress in response to the moment or more persistently in response to how this moment reflects the entirety of many of our lives. Pasts, presents, and possible futures. The cynicism and pessimism that rightfully occurs during these times should not be diminished. There is no space for celebration in the imperial core but we make do. I am not trying to tell anyone who to vote for, or whether to vote or not to vote. Alongside this issue of Rebel Fux, it paints the atmosphere of catastrophe and poison that we all feel as of right now.

In this issue, like the rest of the series, mixed media from a plethora of different sources form a kaleidoscope of eerie collages depicting the affective realities of an election cycle. Photos by Jacob Riis, a  “muck-raking” journalist, and social documentary photographer; photos from the Brown Brothers. Words from Thorstein Bunde Veblen, an economist and sociologist who, during his lifetime, emerged as a well-known critic of capitalism. As well as words from the at-the-time voters’ guide and a “weird gay survey.” I picture the creator of this zine either finding these sources, piecing together what inspires this topic, or whether the pieces emerged first and then the connection between them all made itself evident in the set and setting of election season.

“don’t vote for assholes cause’ assholes hurt people!”

Under these political conditions that everyday person is cut up into individual pieces, reduced to nothingness but a number and statistic. Diminished to a singular action but an action that might feel as if the entire nation, but in the case of the American Imperial Core, the entire world’s weight is upon the choice of your ballot. We still live under the guise of democracy, so these actions do mean something, but remember you are more than that something. Being poisoned by the reduction valve of this action, making all you are what the government proclaims you are, what the government and dominant ideology allow you to imagine yourself and your community to be is a death sentence. A slow but slithering tumor that grows through the entirety of your roots and it is infectious ways.

On page 2
“The principal manifestation of poisoning is central nervous system depression. Blurred or double vision, approaching stupo-”

“The principal manifestation of

 

poisoning is central nervous

system depression.

 

Blurred or double vision, approaching stupo-”

A person photographed by what I assume is Jacob Riis, injecting themselves. The dominant ideology might provide the tools, the substances, and the environments in which we exist for these poisons to thrive, but we are also the ones that place the injection into ourselves. The mental rejection is a tough action against an ever-present powerful tide of the landscape. To stay true to yourself and what you believe in with so much noise, silence has a purpose and that is to listen to the hum of your drum. Remember to honor it despite all the poisonous noise.

Present law obstructs the principles behind any and all human effort and human enjoyment of life and well-being on the whole.

Again, Rebel Fux uses Junji-Ito-esque two-pager spiralizations into horror scenes, but in comparison, this horror is our realities. Violent streets while the angel that watches is omnipresent and being carried by a foreign in emotion but local in its owner: the manifest destiny angel. Painted in “pure femininity” and bringer of the front lines to the expansion of empire, the fate of conquest.

“This ballot proposal is a dose that produces anesthesia” as said on page 10. The ballot is one of the variety of substances used for self-injection produced, serviced, and distributed by the market of the imperial core to its own citizens. This time, as told by Rebel Fux, is an anesthetic. We often connect the anesthetic to the removal and domestication of feeling, but we must also witness the effect of the anesthetic upon movement and action. A form of desensitizing bliss that does not actually provide much-needed rest but is just a muffler and distraction to a possible imagining of what could be done outside, in spite, regardless of, or more than what the ballot offers us. In the injection of the anesthetic, the submitting and entrance of the ballot into its box, we are enticed and given the chance to lay in the imperial bliss of mediocrity. Allow yourself to bear witness within your mind, yourself, your community, and the world, for more.

It is valid and right to mourn and grieve, but the next day utilize said emotions to sensitize your actions. Later on in the zine, this powerful page proclaims “The emphasis is kept on weapons
” Although this zine was created more than 2 decades ago, it still rings true. “…by a passionate common sense,” the landscape that we live in is not and was not created out of failure to its origins and logistical purposes. The “common sense,” the logic built into the system is working perfectly fine, actually working extremely perfectly. The way that it fails multiple groups within its borders and outside of them, is the method of the system. The common sense is very much alive and passionate as we witnessed last night. The structure of the system and its legalities was built to function in this way. All nations, like the human body, run through lifespans and cycles not unique to the present patterns we are experiencing. Although something might feel unique it does not mean it is, and this is not a failure, this feeling is the common sense that has been built into the minds of the everyday American citizen. The “blurred or double vision” trusts the dominant structure. As if its omnipresence that dishonors the divine, is a warm blanket protecting us. In reality, as a frog in a boiling pot, we are being cooked and blissfully staying in vertigo of the water. This cognitive dissonance is essential to the blurring of vision, to leave all of us dizzy to each other, to solidarity.

We are not bound to what has been imposed upon us, just cemented in birth to the reduction valve of this country. Our instinct, although common sense would like us to believe, isn’t isolation and individualism. Discover ways to imagine and do more outside of the mediocre injection of the ballot. Remember and return to what matters.

Valeria is interning at QZAP this semester. She is in her senior year at University of Wisconsin-Madison studying Gender & Women’s Studies. She was born and raised in Valencia, Venezuela and now lives in Teejop land (Madison, WI).

Ephemeral Matters – QZAP at the Nasjonalmuseet

A selection of zines that are part of the exhibit Ephemeral Matters: Into the Fashion Archive We’re super excited to finally announce that we’re participating in an exhibition at the National Museum (Nasjonalmuseet) in Oslo, Norway. Ephemeral Matters – Into the Fashion Archive has been 18 months in the making, but it’s finally here. The long and short of it is that we’ve been collaborating with curator Marco Pecorari and other folks at the museum to be one of five archival collections that maintain materials connected to “the fashion industry.” OR, in our case, may stand in opposition to or interact critically with said industry.

At the beginning of 2024 we worked with Marco to choose items from the QZAP collections to send to display at the museum, focusing on themes of:

  • role of garments
  • vestimentary practices and DIY
  • Community and Subcultures through modelling/garments
  • the body transformation
  • zines that mock, play, refer to fashion magazines/fashion languages
  • nature of zine and zine archives
  • and t-shirts and other wearable ephemera

Photo of one of the exhibition drawers that shows Fatty Fatty 2x4 and Fat Girl #6

As a result, in March of this year we sent over 100 items, including lots of zines including copies of Sexy Magazine (1992), Dr Smith (1984), Blue Floral Gusset (2010), and Fat Girl (1996.) Also included were a selection of queer, punk, zine and library related buttons (badges), DIY printed punk patches, and a selection of similarly themed t-shirts. In turn, they sent their videographer Nicholas to us in Milwaukee. We spent a day in the QZAP archive space shooting a video interview, showing off a lot of our collections and listening to Pink Stëël.

After a summer of exchanged emails and tons of work on part of the museum, the exhibit finally opened on 18 October, 2024 and runs through 23 March, 2025. If you’re not able to make it to Oslo while the exhibit is up, the catalog is available through the Nasjonalmuseet web store for 399 NOK (~$36.50) plus shipping.

We want to shout out huge thank yous to Marco, Hanne, Nicholas, Stine, Maria, Hope and the rest of the museum staff, and also all of the other collectors, designers and archivists who have loaned their ephemeral materials to make the exhibit happen.

A selection of screen-printed punk patches.

 

 

 

Rebel Fux #4: Where Creations End Their Creators

Zine of the Gay

Rebel Fux is a series of mini-zines with a fragmented metaphysical soul. Created by Kate Huh, you can listen to their voice through the orchestration of images and words they unify for us. Each edition of Rebel Fux consists of a different theme and lies in a different node of abstraction depending on the chosen topic. Rebel Fux is a perfect name for the series as it encompasses the rebellion of the spirit through the way we perceive the world in our subjectivities. We f*ck what has been given and shown to us by f*cking the rebellious spirit itself. In disintegrating images of the topic through poetic collages, we feel the aftermath of the spirit’s intercourse as it passes through us.

Rebel Fux #4I will be focusing on Rebel Fux #4 for this post, on the violent creation of nature and the nature of violent creation. Some of the editions in the archive combine figures of the fragmentation and unification Kate uses. This time the words of Mary Shelley and J. Robert Oppenheimer danced about the page of Lynd Ward’s eerie woodcuts. The connection between the modern Prometheus myth and the creation of a weapon of death is the overarching thread here. A deep sense of questioning the ethics of the creator’s intention, actions, and results of what their hands were involved in conducting. Either way, we immediately know the feelings of the creator of this zine about these questions, light-heartedly on the first page as 1931 Frankenstein’s Monster presents Kate’s formidable voice:

“In this issue it becomes clear; if you fux with Nature, Nature fux with you
”

Nature is capitalized and fortified in a conscious way which I highly appreciate. An autonomous spirit of choice and marker of vengeance for any disrespectful alchemist efforts that do not withhold and honor the balance of our elements. Grounded by reality, this could not feel more poignant and demanding than today as according to new research, the vast majority (over 99%) of the 281,000 metric tonnes of  CO2 emissions estimated to have been generated in the first 60 days of Israel’s genocide on Palestine were greater than the annual carbon footprint of more than 20 of the world’s most climate-vulnerable nations. In clear connections to our presents, pasts, and unfortunate futures, in Rebel Fux, we see the becoming and unbecoming of creator and creature as demise descends for the mortal price of fuxxing with Nature.

Quotes from Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein spiral into the ultimate point of magnetization and explosion, such as the atom bomb itself, into his creator’s words. J. Robert Oppenheimer, the father of the atom bomb, is a Prometheus-Frankenstein figure and we see in his creation and words how so.

shed countless tears; happy beyond hope thus inexorable fate be satisfied, and if the destructio pause before the peace Again shall you raise the funeral wail, I received their cold answers, It is the kind of schizophrenia we physicists have been living with for several years now unfeeling reasoning died s on my lips.The fuxxed creator’s journey vacuums alongside Lynd Ward’s woodcut prints. In an extreme black point contrast, the direct lines set a scene for the poetics. Ward illustrated a 1934 edition of Frankenstein, published in New York by Harrison Smith and Robert Haas. These are outstanding, not only for excellence and power of design but especially for insights into a disturbing and powerfully poetic solely in the visual plane. Makes me wonder about the process of these woodcuts, and the type of creation into nature’s skin, the wood of a tree. Which then this zine integrates back the words of Mary Shelley into the visuals for the nexus point of bearing witness to the birth of a creation that you know in prophetic unfolding will mass into death and destruction.

Cover of the 1934 edition of Frankenstein by Mary Shelley, Illustrated by Lynd Ward and Justine in Prison in “Frankenstein” by Lynd Ward
Justine in Prison in “Frankenstein” by Lynd Ward

The integration of such distinct acts of creation insights wonder into the possibilities of the animativity of the creation itself. Frankenstein’s monster while considered an abomination, was only through tragic self-undoing, was there actual violence in response. Oppenheimer’s atom bomb has no consciousness, in its inanimacy, the consciousness is of its creator and user. So therefore the consequences and material actions that come from such creations come from the intentionality and unintentionality of their creators.

 

Remember, thou hast made me more powerful than myself your anguish, is dear to me, a single bomb.“I shall not be merely weaving a series of supernatural terrors.

The great discoveries of modern science have been put to horrible use.

Remember, thou hast made me more powerful than myself

your anguish,

is dear to me,

a single bomb.”

Oppenheimer’s pure curiosity is creation with the matters and physics held carelessly on the other side of its coin. As we create, the spaces left out in our creation are still real and will be held captive and used by successors. Oppenheimer was a seeker of creation, not death. Frankenstein was a seeker of transmutation, not monstrosity. Prometheus was a seeker and holder of intelligence not the horrors of mankind. Nevertheless, their hands lead to such events. They did not think of it. And in the divine humbling that the balance of nature does to all of us: what they did not pay attention to, what was left uncalculated, calculated itself into a haunting in the shadows. To be the effect of the cause they created. As for me, I am not sure I blame the creator for the destruction creations caused and keep on causing, but I sure do blame their lack of care. Being lost in the fullness of the thirst, a wonder of wonder is intoxicating, but remembering where you stand is integral. The earth that gives you the materials off her back for the projects. The atoms, the organs, the fire.

When I saw that ball of fire, two passages in the Bhagavad-Gita came to my mind. One was: And the other: "The radiance of a thousand suns which suddenly illuminate the beavens all in one moment-thus the splendor of the Lord." "And I am Death, who taketh all, who shatters worlds.

The climax of the zine is Oppenheimer’s words bearing witness to the destruction of his own creation. The mass blinding event of witnessing shot him towards the future of the scale of what he had done. These pages in full depiction of this moment as it shows us Frankestein’s monster, Lynd Ward’s woodcut, and an indistinct man in pain, is reminiscent of Junji Ito’s methods of somber horror. In his manga, he circulates the reader with images of dizziness into a trap of a double panel of your own turning. The spiralization into the concise moment of inescapability for what you have been led into, and this moment
 for the creator of pain: they lead themselves and everyone down such a spiral.

Throughout this post, I have been using the word “creator” instead of  “scientist” even though throughout the zine it focuses on scientists and their creation fuxxing with nature. However, I think any form of creation can fall victim and perpetrator to this violence, in different forms. Technologies and their consumer, politics in societal structures, art in culture, and more. Not all creation is of this sort. When we go outside of the bounds of the bounty that nature gives us. When we do not honor the flow of intuitive creation in balance with our place within it.

But am I not alone, miserably alone? if You, my creator, abhor me

In the end, Rebel Fux gives the voice back to the creation. A being or unbeing that is condemned, because of the carelessness and oversight of their poisonous curious creator, to the undoing of the ethics of their future and present users. The dysautonomia of their free will results in this inescapability.

As humanity seems to be in a dizzying repetitive violence of history, genocide on top of genocides, are we not Frankestein’s monster? Have we been removed from our autonomy because of the conditions of our creation? When the alchemist that melded our clay into our human bodies and granted us life, did they too exclaim “And I am Death, who taketh all, who shatters worlds
”?

Valeria is interning at QZAP this semester. She is in her senior year at University of Wisconsin-Madison studying Gender & Women’s Studies. She was born and raised in Valencia, Venezuela and now lives in Teejop land (Madison, WI).

Queer History Making / Making Queer History

Zine of the GayFirst things first: Happy Queer History Month! History is built upon the reality we have all agreed upon to pass down. The stories that are decided to be honored and remembered. The markers of history and how we learn about it are integral to the fabric of communities and cultures. How we commune with the tangibility of our ancestors and have a stepping stone in our lineage. It is no surprise that a key element of suppression is a historical one, that is why this month is so important.

Out of the Closets and Into the Libraries
The version at archive.qzap.org is intended to be downloaded, printed and distributed.

Out of the Closets and Into the Libraries by the Bang-A-Rang Collective is a zine of radical queer moments navigating us through history


As a young queer that grew up in spaces where non-heteronormativity didn’t exist, the idea of queer elders was a fantasy that I thought would be real once I came out the closet. Unfortunately, this wasn’t the case because of such history unmaking. Specially for queer poc. One has to go searching for history when it has been erased for you. Such a search and thirst to learn more about the history of you and your people, the truths that cement the foundation you stand on is an act of care for the legacies they made.

The creator was answered the same questions all young queer people have with such a thirst: where is our history? Where are our elders?

“When I confronted my few older queer friends, they smiled apologetically and remarked, “you don’t know these histories because a lot of people that could tell these stories were either murdered by homophobes or murdered by AIDS. The rest of us, the survivors, either don’t know our own histories or are petrified to have any sort of relationships with the younger generations, fearing the label predator and child molester.”

Remembering is an act of honoring and resistance. It is an act of learning and of loving yourself and your lineage. In all its splendid ugly and beauty. I have found that although such remembering does not come easy to history riddled with erasure, the effort that one has to learn to braid into the attempt almost makes it all the more sweet. All histories that are hidden have pressurized into a diamond in the mine of your lineage.

Queer to the Left
 Queer Holocaust
 Lesbian Avengers
 QueerNation
 QueerLiberation Army
 White Night Riots
 Pink Panthers
 STAR
 QueerFist.. Combahee River Collective
 Stonewall
 Gay Shame
 George Jackson Brigade
 Homocore
 Gay Liberation Front
 ACT UP
 Compton Cafeteria Riot
 Out of Control
 Gay Activist Alliance


If you don’t recognize one or some of these moments, this zine is for you.

* these moments in queer history are not subject to chronological order. The decision not to arrange things in such an order is intentional. Chronology suggests things have come and gone where we believe many things continue to be very much present and important. Chronological order also often suggests progress, and I do not believe moving forward when the world is so fucking backwards is a step in the right direction...

Something that I deeply appreciate is the nonlinearity of the zine. Time itself is subjective and its affective realities in our minds are anything but one dimensional. When one remembers one doesn’t go through every second from the moment you are to the moment you were. Our lives and our ancestors are not neatly winded into a coil of cassette tape to rewind through. Rather time is in a perpetual vomiting and unwinding of such cassettes, our times being in constant undoing through doing. This zine reflects the act of remembering such radical moments. In such entanglements one’s memories form new connections.

To attempt chronology is to go through the structure that was the one that attempted the erasure of our history. Queering such chronology is necessary to the understanding that the future isn’t ahead of us. We cannot see the future but we can attempt to bear witness to the past to inform the cradle of our necks that nurture a possible futurity.

â–Čâ–Œâ–Čâ–Œâ–Č

I will not be going through the entire zine for a summary for you. I urge you to read the zine yourself, to envelope yourself in history making in such resistance work. The work that has allowed me to be semi-okay on campus with a shirt that says “I ❀  Pussy”. How much queerness is synonymous to political resistance.

I do want to shout out our very own and its part to such history-making. Homocore! Zinesters! I call upon you to be history in your history:

As with punk, queercore culture existed outside of the mainstream so zines were crucial to its development. Hundreds of zines formed an intercontinental network that enabled queercore to spread and allow those in smaller, more repressive communities to participate. The DIY attitude of punk was integral to queercore as well. In the 1990s, as the availability of the internet increased, many queercore zines, such as Noise Queen could be found online as well as in print. The queercore zine label Xerox Revolutionaries run by Hank Revolt, was available online and distributed zines from 2000 to 2005. Queercore forums and chatrooms, such as QueerPunks started up. The Queer Zine Archive Project is an internet database of scanned queer zines that continues to grow.

Valeria is interning at QZAP this semester. She is in her senior year at University of Wisconsin-Madison studying Gender & Women’s Studies. She was born and raised in Valencia, Venezuela and now lives in Teejop land (Madison, WI).

The Lesbian Avengers: Have We Always Had the Same Issues?

Zine of the GayIn my personal experiences in queer “activist” spaces, I have often felt a dissonant feeling about the uncommitment for action. This “activism” with no action! The “activists” becoming more “actors” at a performance of progress rather than tangible change. In my objective mind and what I will always tell people first, the mentality I go into these activist spaces is something along the lines of



 that all effort is worthwhile, all efforts towards progress should not be halted just because they are not radical enough. We need to eat to enact the revolution. We need to make sure we survive today to protest tomorrow. The effort of the improvement of current living conditions should never be considered obsolete. Mental and physical health is super important, take care of yourself above anything. How could we honor the martyrs all around the world if we do not continue doing anything we can? How can we say that all the effort up until now is worth nothing? Isn’t the most revolutionary thing to have radical hope and to enact it in any way possible?

Lesbian Avengers DYKE MANIFESTO Perhaps it is because of my young self in these times of grand disillusionment with the world, but in my heart and people that know me deeply know I want to scream and bite people’s heads off for the incompetence and inaction that occurs. The anger that lights my eardrums on fire for the way that people cannot see how it is a waste of time to put energy on discourse on trivial matters is when people’s lives are on the line! How selfish it is to put your own feelings and ideologies first above the group! What happened to coalition-building?! How selfish and elitist it is to feud and then refuse to work together on the common goal because of your conceptions and perspectives on how you understood the theory that you read (or didn’t read)! Why is everyone just sitting around and talking about how they can’t do anything? What do you mean you are so angry you do nothing? How are you not so angry and do something? How could we honor the martyrs all around the world if we do not continue doing anything we can?

I believe both of these things at the same time but it does make me feel dizzy when in discourse I am told they are opposition. In contrast, I see them in innate relation. Doing everything we can, rest and action, despite it all is radical hope. To be a revolutionary you must be so angry at the world for its current state and its capacity to be better. Being impatient because it can be better and it isn’t. Imagining always ends up with me being on the street. Being an activist is having the radical hope that the revolution isn’t raining down on a random day like the rapture but you are going to be part of it.

Consciously I am aware that rarely have none of us gone through a truly unique experience. However, considering how every mind is an island, sometimes we forget the sea. Our antecedents and shoulders in which we stand upon to look out into the sea. As I was scavenging a zine to write about I stumbled upon the fabulous and extremely validating manifesto zine for the Lesbian Avengers. A hilarious and extremely dykey call to action, impatience, and mobilization effort. What a comfort


Founded in 1992, the Lesbian Avengers were a direct action group focused on lesbian visibility  and survival. According to their telling of their history: “Too impatient for lobbying or letter-writing, these fire-eating secretaries, students, cab drivers, journalists, artists and teachers joined together to create fabulous street actions that inserted lesbians into public life, forced political change, and redefined dykes as the coolest, most ferocious, girls on the block.”

The Lesbian Avengers' Civil Rights Organizing Project (LACROP)
Via: The Lesbian Avengers

The Lesbian Avengers’ Civil Rights Organizing Project (LACROP) went further, taking a group of lesbians where they’d never been before — into the heart of heartland politics. LACROP transformed grassroots organizing by putting local activists front and center, pushing them to be fully out, and eschewing mainstream campaign tactics that relied on people remaining in the closet. In Maine, it organized door-to-door canvassing and led community forums where people came out publicly—including teachers and small business owners. Where mainstream efforts in Idaho tended to do one thing, LACROP did almost the opposite: putting local queer people at the front of, and in charge of, goal setting, public events such as speak-outs and kiss-ins, and door-to-door outings sharing personal stories. By empowering queer people to come out and to engage directly with their communities, LACROP defeated an homophobic initiative in rural Idaho and laid long-term infrastructure for social change.

“Media was often key
The Lesbian Avengers shaped their actions for visual impact, and had media committees dedicated to outreach and ‘propaganda.’”

In the zine we have archived, the manifesto shows us this in the dykiest way possible. Bright pink and in all caps, I am truly being showered in lesbian rage. Calling out all lesbians from all corners and crevices they may be hiding in


“IT’S TIME TO GET OUT OF THE BEDS, OUT OF THE BARS AND INTO THE STREETS TIME TO SEIZE THE POWER OF DYKE LOVE, DYKE VISION, DYKE ANGER DYKE INTELLIGENCE, DYKE STRATEGY. TIME TO ORGANIZE AND IGNITE. TIME TO GET TOGETHER AND FIGHT WE’RE INVISIBLE AND IT’S NOT SAFE- NOT AT HOME, ON THE JOB, IN THE STREETS OR IN THE COURTS WHERE ARE OUR LESBIAN LEADERS?”

The first page of this zine is a punch in the face but you like it. A punch that tells you to get your lesbo s*** together while having a good laugh. Truly enveloping yourself into the evil dyke archetype that gets matters mobile. There is an ever present sense of that impatience and exasperated feeling that any person, including myself, is overcome with one point or another that fuels a certain kind of anger:

“WE’RE NOT WAITING FOR THE RAPTURE. WE ARE THE APOCALYPSE. WE’LL BE YOUR DREAM AND THEIR NIGHTMARE.” 

The Lesbian Avengers queer political language and “propaganda.” Using catchy short sentences of action and purpose such as the ones we have been too heavily familiarized with in campaign cycles. This time around in the most queer way possible of such language: instead of performative words to gain votes, its real promises. Instead of comforting and digestible slogans, we have “predatory” lesbianistic and often sexual threats to enact fear and recruit!

On the following page of the zine we are introduced more formally to the main aims and goals of the Lesbian Avengers: Who are the Lesbian Avengers? What is direct action? And why no abstract theoretical discussion?

Welcome AvengerThey define direct action as “a public intervention ranging in creative form from marches to street theater to speak outs to cathartic spray painting of anti-hate slogans.”

Such creative interventions are what should be at the core of mobilization efforts to make the public uncomfortable, aware, and inconvenienced. Reminding that lesbians are here.

WHY NO ABSTRACT THEORETICAL DISCUSSION? How many of us have sat in meetings arguing political theory to the point of mental and physical exhaustion, to the point where we run screaming to the nearest dance floor for release from the frustration?! To keep our work pro-active and fulfilling and successful, we focus our political discussions on the creation and purpose of an action. We agree to disagree on political ideology--it is too easy to create false polarities. We also encourage women to take responsibility for their own suggestions--be willing to make them happen. Instead of saying "Someone should..." try saying "I will." or "Who will do this with me?" In our meetings, if you disagree with a proposal on the floor, instead of tearing it apart, propose another way of realizing the goal. The Avengers is a place where ideas are realized, where lesbians can have an impact. A crucial part of that is learning how to propose alternatives instead of just offering critiques. Be willing to put your body where your brain is--matter over mind!In the section on abstract theoretical discussion they ask “How many of us have sat in meetings arguing political theory to the point of mental and physical exhaustion, to the point where we run screaming to the nearest dance floor for release from the frustration?!” ME! ME! ME!

I will not make the case against abstract theoretical discussion, if anything I am all for it. I want to surround my life with abstractism, art, and theory. In the overdetermination of understanding and defining, we have lost the sauce. What the western mindset has failed to realize is that abstractism and theory is not the thing itself but the action of forming meaning and nomenclature for aspects of experience, humanity, and existence, that are based in reality. Simply that our language doesn’t not have tangible tools to describe such elements. What we are describing is very real and the action that must be connected to it must be very real as well. One drives the other and vice versa. Theory and abstractism exist because of reality. Discussions around theory that don’t leave you stimulated and itchy with the capacity and fuel to do something
 going out to the street, creating something, forming a connection
 babe. Discussions on political theory that lead to inaction because of political polarity
 isn’t that the antithesis of why we are here? You forgot to touch the grass that you have been reading so much about! It’s right there!

Their communiquĂ©-style newsletters gave activism the duality of action and being cool. “Look how much we’re getting done, and how much fun we’re having while we do it.” Using camp design, being loud and threatening about their lesbian activism, and putting their money where their mouth is, the Lesbian Avengers reminded me of my frustrations are not alone and to drown in my anger so it turns into passive resentment. There is always the fuel for it
 like vandalism to a Navy billboard:

Valeria is interning at QZAP this semester. She is in her senior year at University of Wisconsin-Madison studying Gender & Women’s Studies. She was born and raised in Valencia, Venezuela and now lives in Teejop land (Madison, WI).

Queer City, Pt 2: Rachel Pepper – “Life in the early 1990’s was about living in the moment”

Zine of the Gay

QUEER CITY. EDITORS RACHEL 3 The female editor of QUEER CITY is Rachel Pepper. By day she's a high-powered book clerk at A Different Light, San Francisco's queer bookstore, by night she splits a dual personna of club-girl extraordinaire and house bound recluse. She writes a bi-weekly column for the Bay Area Reporter called "The Outer Limit," is a San Francisco correspondant for OUTWEEK mag, and loves to undertake time consuming, low profit projects like this one. Check out her first solo 'zine effort, CUNT, a hot hip dyke publication she knocked out in three days of frenzied creative hysteria. Rachel's a self-described "ACI UP Type" who participates in activist politics, dyes her hair blonde, is pondering getting a tattoo, and is a strong-willed Taurean. You can sometimes find her on the stage of Club 0 dancing nasty and cruising the scene with her friend Daula, or soaking in Osento's hot tub with her master gal Deborah. Se loves cute women in black leather jackets who are bold enough to approach her in bars and ask for her phone number. Snap to it, girls. TOP PHOTO BY ELIZABETH MANGELSDORF BOTTOM PHOTO ALEX
From Queer City

After I spoke with Alexander Chee about Queer City, he connected me with his coauthor, Rachel Pepper.

As I mentioned in the previous post, Queer City distinguished itself from other queer zines and cultural efforts of its time in having two co-authors of different genders, attempting to bridge the gap between the city’s dyke and fag scenes as well as to the document queer, trans, leather, and/or SM scenes that existed outside of or in more complex relationship to those boundaries.

In her sections of the zine, Rachel writes about good spots for women amidst the male-centric world of the Castro (“And if you’re feeling particularly raunchy, consider getting your labia pierced. After all, if Susie Bright could do it, so can you!”), “the truth about girl bars” (“When the dance floor is too packed, slam dance everyone out of your way or create your own dance floor somewhere else”), and the city’s top attractions for out-of-town lesbian visitors (“And you must take your bod to Osento, our women’s bath house, where you can join women of all sizes and colors sitting around the hottub or in the saunas. Rather than any bar, Osento, whose business is spread primarily through word of mouth, is the true heart of San Francisco’s women’s community.”)

Rachel kindly provided the following recollections by email:

∇Δ∇Δ∇Δ

Life in the early 1990’s was about living in the moment. There were few distractions: no internet, no cell phones. We lived intently every day, in part because we were young and passionate and queer and in love with it all and each other, and also in part because so many of us were dying. We only had each other, and we lived for each day we had alive. It was the most incredible time of my life. I worked in the epicenter of it all, A Different Light Bookstore in San Francisco. Part bookstore, part community center, part waystation for disenfranchised queers. We were the pulse, and I reveled in it.

“New In Town? Read This,” from Queer City
“10 Things That Are The Same Anywhere You Go In Queer Nation,” from Queer City

Queer City was born from our restless quest for meaning, for love, for leaving our mark, and to say: we were here, we do actually feel blessed to live here, and maybe you can get here too. We also liked the union of young dykes and gay men- a newer concept in 1990. We wanted to represent unity as young queer people. Making the zine was fun. It was all done by hand, low tech, then photocopied down the street at Copy Central. I think I assembled it by hand too. Then we sold it in the bookstore, and it was very popular. No doubt it traveled around the world. We made a limited run of T shirts too, which sold out. I think I’ve still got one around somewhere!

 

I wasn’t really influenced by other zines, I think we just had our own vision and went for it, but other classic zines I loved at the time included Hothead Paisan. I even ended up getting a tattoo from Diane DiMassa to celebrate turning 30, then flew to London afterwards. Ah, youth!

Lee P, interning at QZAP in summer 2024, is a long-time zine maker whose current project is Sheer Spite Press, a small press and zine distro. Originally from unceded Algonquin land, Lee calls Tiohtià:ke // Mooniyang // Montreal home. Lee is also a member of the organizing collective for Dick’s Lending Library, a community-run, local library of books by trans, non-binary, and Two-Spirit authors.

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