Tag: transgender

Gender Trash from Hell

Zine of the Gay

A collage of black and white images of faces and bodies against a pinkish background, with collaged text reading "gendertrash FROM HELL"
Front cover of gendertrash #1

Walking into the physical QZAP archive as an intern and a long-time zine dork is overwhelming. There’s so much stuff. There are a lot of things I have read, or that are made by people I know, and seeing those items in the folders feels like running into a friend. There is also a lot of work in the archives by people I don’t know firsthand, but who are some of the people I look up to most, and regard as vital elders and ancestors. The first thing I saw in the archives that made me feel completely teary and overwhelmed was gendertrash (also known as Gender Trash or gendertrash from hell).

As someone who spends a lot of time in both Montreal and Toronto, I regard gendertrash and its authors as a vital part of the trans cultures of both of those cities. Published under the label of genderpress, which also sold some truly excellent buttons, gendertrash was produced primarily by Xanthra Phillippa, who was a fixture of Toronto’s trans communities until her death in 2014, and “Jeanne B,” aka the filmmaker and activist Mirha-Soleil Ross, who was originally from Montreal.

(A note on names: I don’t usually use my full or legal name in my zines, and I deeply respect people’s right to remain anonymous or pseudonymous in their zines. Since Ross is widely acknowledged online as one of the zine’s authors, I’m erring here on the side of giving her credit for her work, rather than sticking with her pseudonym.)

There were four issues of gendertrash. The first issue, which is the one held in QZAP’s archives, was published in Toronto in the spring of 1993, 31 years ago. The other issues are also available online through the Arquives, which also, delightfully, holds many of the original paste-ups for the zines.

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Collaged text reading "We're just as queer as dykes and fags maybe even more so!"
Back cover of gendertrash #1

Like many zines, especially of its era, gendertrash contains a wide range of content and tone. (As someone who makes zines that tend to be more like a cohesive essay or book, I think it’s doing me a lot of good to look at this style of zine, and it makes me want to make something that’s a mishmash of personal anecdotes, opinions, resources, recipes, creative writing, etc. — that part of the messiness and imperfection of zines got away from me at some point.)

gendertrash places sex work and sex workers squarely at the centre of its focus, where it belongs. To talk about transness without talking about sex work would be to leave out a huge swath of the community, and many of its strongest pillars, including Ross, whose sex work and creative work have been closely intertwined.

Some parts of the zine are squarely pragmatic. It reproduces a brochure of safety guidelines for electrolysis practitioners, so that electrolysis clients can know what standards to hold their practitioners to. It has a section at the end of local resources for sex workers, people seeking healthcare, and for those experiencing sexual violence, noting which organizations “have no problems with TS’s” or are “aware of the problems of TS youth (esp with shelters & housing)”. It also notes local events like the queer zine gathering Spew 3 at the queer theatre Buddies In Bad Times, which is blessedly still with us.

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The zine also contains installments of TSe TSe TerroriSm, a serialized novel about “some members of Toronto’s gender described community,” by Phillips. When its protagonist is street-harassed by some men in a Jeep, she sets off,

“Two huge Catherine Wheels, one pink, one blue, as big as suns, rise up out of the fireball, lighting the street, buildings, stores & all the people rushing out onto balconies & pouring out of the restaurants & nearby shops to stare, laugh, applaud, cheer & give deliberately misleading or useless information to the cops, now beginning to arrive in a parade of sirens & lights, to investigate the blackened & smoking carcass that once was a Jeep.”

After escaping, she’s comforted by a friend or lover, sharing her rage and sorrow that passers-by were,

“celebrating like it’s something wonderful & exciting & like i-did-it-all-for-them, instead of the nightmare it really was. it’s not a game or a party. i mean, where the fuck were they, when i was being attacked? hiding inside their safe closets, shaking & shivering, but as soon as they see & hear the fireworks, out they come with fucking bells on. those creeps nearly killed, would have killed me for certain – it was that dangerous & here they are, out celebrating. i kill four creeps by setting them on fire because it was necessary. i’d do it again if necessary, but it’s nothing to cheer about”

In its combination of magic realism with a clear-eyed look at the emotional and physical toll of transmisogny, it reminded me of the work of another Toronto-based writer: Kai Cheng Thom’s beautiful book Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars.

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TS Words and Phrases
“TS Words and Phrases”, from gendertrash #1

The first issue of gendertrash also includes a fascinating glossary of “TS Words & Phrases.” As my piece last week on the QZAP blog shows, I am deeply fascinated with the numerous ways that gender and sexual minority folks have described ourselves over the years, and our consistent vehemence that the current terms are the only correct ones.

gendertrash’s glossary, also reflected throughout the zine, uses the term “members of the gender communities,” instead of what they call “the clumsy-sounding transpersons.” The people I would refer to as cis, it defines as “genetics, genetically/chromosonally described/determined”. This distinction is also delightfully made in the zine’s usage instructions, which state that,

“material in gendertrash may be copied for personal use by any gender described person or for publication within any non-profit journal for gender described, as long as the proper credit is given. Material may be copied & used by genetics only upon prior written consent from genderpress.”

One of the most interesting glossary entries to me is their use of the term “gender oriented”, which is used to refer to “wimmin, men or people who attracted to TS’s”, whether those people are genetics or in the gender communities, or what I’d call trans or cis. Extending the umbrella out over people who date and/or fuck trans people isn’t usually part of the conversation in the circles I’ve travelled in, and I find it interesting to think about! This concept also comes out in the zine’s piece about the 1992 movie The Crying Game, which trans people in my life have felt a lot of ways about:

“This man is spontaneously and strongly attracted to Dil for her female or non-male attributes. not her cock and balls. In fact, the main character thinks she is a genetic womyn & is surprised & upset to find out that she is not. Gay men will have to realize & accept the fact that genetic men who are attracted to us (TV, TG or TS) are not gay, but gender-oriented & that their numbers are constantly growing. In other words. we’re having a party & genetic gay men are not invited.”

(The glossary also includes the delightfully punk “in the pit” as a replacement for “in the closet”, and the poignant entry “that’s the way it is is the phrase we use to describe how we survive in this society.”)

There is so much for a contemporary trans reader to enjoy and learn from in gendertrash. It’s a joy and a blessing to me that it’s been archived so that I can enjoy it 30+ years after it was published.

Lee P, interning at QZAP in summer 2024, is a long-time zine maker whose current project is Sheer Spite Press, a small press and zine distro. Originally from unceded Algonquin land, Lee calls Tiohtià:ke // Mooniyang // Montreal home. Lee is also a member of the organizing collective for Dick’s Lending Library, a community-run, local library of books by trans, non-binary, and Two-Spirit authors.

U.S. Kweer Corps

Zine of the Gay

U.S. Kweer Corps, Issue #1, July 2000 Queer Punks, Unite to Fight!! Keeping things radical, today’s Zine of the Gay is U.S. Kweer Corps by friend of the archive Hank Thigpen. Starting in July 2000 and continuing through the early 2000s, Kweer Corps were shorter digests focused on the queer punk scene Hank was observing in Florida. In our archive we have issues #1, #2, #9, and #10.

Kweer Corps #1 includes the Kweer Corps Manifesto, a statement of the issues Hank sees in the punk scene and with queer people. A majority of these issues revolve around the lack of revolutionary spirit in punks and queer people who had been the ones ready to fight for revolution in the past. Hank declares real punk dead, as current punks are more focused on fashion statements and mistreating women at shows than any real political movement, and how other genres of music enjoyed by queer people lack action and purpose. Hank reminds readers that “queers helped create early punk… and kept themselves in every scene and movement in between and STILL havent started fighting for the revolution we’ve been preaching this whole time.” He ends the manifesto with a call to action, saying:

Because I’m ready for MY goddam riot.

Because I cant be the only one.

For these, and for a hundred other day to day reasons, Im a part of the Kweer Corps.

Queer punks, unite to fight!

Hank follows this up in Kweer Corps #2 by talking about the loneliness he experiences as a queer punk, and how he sees other queers at the random punk show but nowhere else. We recommend you read this one for yourselves as the writing here is particularly striking, especially the line: “Straight edge kids and skinheads all know their brothers. Why don’t I know you?” Hank writes about the Kweer Corps as being an alternative to this loneliness that he suspects other queer radicals experience as well through the creation of a community of radical queers across the country.

Cover of U.S. Kweer Corps #9 Image shows a roll of pennies, and the text on the cover reads: “PENNY ROLLS: legal & handy Use electrical or duct tape reinforce ends first! added weight in your fist make the punch so much harder” “I would sooner fuck a dog than let your bigoted bullshit go unpunished.”We then jump to Kweer Corps #9, which starts by showing you how to reinforce a penny roll to add weight to your punches. This issue focuses on physical violence experienced by queer people, challenging what “Your parents told you from the beginning, “Ignore them and they’ll go away.”” Hank encourages hitting back when harassed or beaten up, saying “peaceful resistance doesn’t work against individual attacks.” He states: 

I’m gonna take the knowledge that I will hit back and use it to make myself stronger. I’m gonna think of all the girls and boys who are too small to fight back and I’m gonna get one lick in for them, too.

Hank argues that through fighting back against bigoted, sexist actions, we can start a revolution, and ends the zine by saying, “Instant physical retribution for any attack. Queer punks fight back.”

Kweer Corps #10 is focused on the exclusion of and responses to the Michigan Women’s Music Fest, a festival that stopped in 2015 and only allowed women-born-women into the festival. Hank sees issue both with the exclusionary nature of the festival, and the trans-organized protests that form outside of the festival every year. He writes: “Here’s an idea – instead of spending all that time, energy, and money protesting against women who don’t feel comfortable with things they don’t understand, all to get into a music fest where people like Lucy Blue Trem-bleh headline, why not make our own fuckin weekend of music?” He argues that there are ample resources, a lack of loyalty among the younger women who go, and no monopoly on the performers, so why not? “If we can create our own gender expression, we should be able to create our own shows.” “With all the cute transfolk out there, I would say it’s gonna be her loss, right?”

Kit Gorton is a current intern at QZAP and graduate student at University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee in library science and English, with focuses on archives and media studies. A rather queer Hobbit, Kit is most often seen collecting things (such as leaves, rocks, books and the like) or doting on their cat, Good Omens Written in Collaboration by Neil Gaiman and Sir Terry Pratchett.

Hot Rods

Zine of the Gay

Hot Rods zine coverFrom the femme herbal transition of The Transgender Herb Garden, we are now transitioning (hehe wink wink) towards Hot Rods, a zine of health resources for “For Folks assigned a Female sex at birth who have strayed from that path” in Oregon. The zine was made by Gender Machine Works, a direct action group serving “female assigned, gender-variant” (or FAGV) people based in Portland, Oregon, and was published in 2002. This is the only zine we have in our digital collection made by Gender Machine Works.

Despite being written with a very specific audience in mind (FAGV people in Portland in 2002), this zine has a lot of incredibly useful, effectively timeless, information. This includes the effects of hormonal testosterone on the body, their information on routine healthcare procedures for AFAB individuals, how to check for breast cancer and do hormone injections safely, safe sex tips, and a wealth of other important knowledge for not just physical, but mental female assigned, gender-variant health.

From a use standpoint, the only downside is that a lot of the information they give is very area-specific and probably outdated. However, looking at it from a historical lens, it gives a lot of information about doctors, groups, and resources that may not be well-documented, making this zine a really important record in Portland queer history. They are also supportive of a multitude of gender identities and are incredibly open to a multitude of viewpoints regarding transitioning.

In a world where transgender healthcare rights are being taken away right in front of us, we feel it’s incredibly important to come together as a community, and know that despite everything we can support each other and find the cracks in the systems restricting us from getting essential care. We feel that this zine is a great example of the queer community doing just that.

Kit Gorton is a current intern at QZAP and graduate student at University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee in library science and English, with focuses on archives and media studies. A rather queer Hobbit, Kit is most often seen collecting things (such as leaves, rocks, books and the like) or doting on their cat, Good Omens Written in Collaboration by Neil Gaiman and Sir Terry Pratchett.

The Transgender Herb Garden

Zine of the Gay

Hello ! This summer we once again have a cohort of interns working on several projects, one of which includes a month-long research and blogging project called Queer Zine of the Gay. We will be posting just about every other day for ‘Pride Month’ 2023 on a zine within our holdings, which will hopefully be new to even the most experienced zinesters. So join us on this journey through QZAP’s holdings 3-4 times a week, (usually Monday, Wednesday, and Friday) here on the QZAP blog! The first Queer Zine of the Gay is…

The Transgender Herb Garden coverThe Transgender Herb Garden: an MtF guide to disconnecting oneself from big pharma by FlyingOtter is a cottagecore-anarchist zine focused on the use of herbs to help facilitate physical transition rather than relying on pharmaceutical companies. This zine was published in 2009 and upon some supplemental research seems to be one of the few zines made by FlyingOtter. This zine is a one-off, but is also held by other queer zine archives, so it must have circulated well.

FlyingOtter starts by addressing the fact that this is not medical advice, but is rather suggestions on herbs to eat for other MtF people that may help them appear more feminine as the herbs helped her. However, ze suggests that anyone can read this and get advice from it, as “trying different plants and foods will inform you about yourself”.

“As you take the time to sense how it makes you feel , how your body reacts, in its slightest movements and ways — as you come to know your own body, that is the key to transforming it, maintaining it, and healing it.”

Ze recommends eating the herbs raw, though teas also can be useful, as well as finding a good balance for how often you consume them. Ze also suggests switching up the herbs you’re eating, especially if you’re MtF, as “A bio-woman’s biology/hormones change throughout a month, no reason to not do the same.” Some of the herbs ze suggests include sage, fennel, and clover, which are all wonderful nonbinary names. FlyingOtter says that they won’t stimulate breast growth, but will help add fullness to the face and thighs, while helping create an hourglass figure.

Some other zines (page 8) cite this zine as purely anecdotal, which is true, but they also point out the information on transplanting the plants Ze does discuss is rather helpful. We also personally don’t mind how anecdotal the zine is. In reading it we get a much better sense of the person writing it, the environment and feeling that ze carries with zir than information on the plants ze suggests using. But that doesn’t mean we’re not learning anything from FlyingOtter. Ze very clearly has a lot of gardening knowledge, including information about the amount of nitrogen carried by certain seeds that will add to your soil, and where things should be planted depending upon use. Ze also advocates for community herb gardening with female bodied people, and breaking away from the machine of capitalism, which are easy to get behind.

One of the most interesting parts of the zine is where FlyingOtter discusses gender as a construct of capitalism, and looks forward to the day where there is no gender. Seeing this through their perspective we think is rather telling of where the queer community was in regards to nonbinary and agender genders in 2009, and we highly recommend reading it for yourself.

⚠️ ⚠️ Additional Advisory Note!!! If interested in using herbs similarly, lovely reader, you should consult with professional herbalists when embarking on using herbs in a medicinal or health-boosting capacity.

Kit Gorton is a current intern at QZAP and graduate student at University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee in library science and English, with focuses on archives and media studies. A rather queer Hobbit, Kit is most often seen collecting things (such as leaves, rocks, books and the like) or doting on their cat, Good Omens Written in Collaboration by Neil Gaiman and Sir Terry Pratchett.

The Toni Compendium

Advertisement for The Toni Compendium. The cartoon adventures of a transgendered high school student, as originally presented in "Cross-Talk” from 1989 to 1991. Also includes four single-panel cartoons never published in "Cross-Talk and a self-portrait of the artist, Angel.This story is likely part one of what might be several posts, and it goes something like this:

Sometime in the autumn of 2018 during one of our evening work sessions we were making our way through a collection of materials that had been deassessioned from an academic library and came across a couple of copies of Cross-Talk Magazine, “The Gender Community’s News & Information Monthly.”

Amongst ads for other queer publications like Dragazine, Black Sheets, and a note that Cross-Talk can now be reached on FidoNet (started by Tom Jennings, one of folks who made Homocore zine) was an ad for The Toni Compendium. The Toni Compendium is an anthology of Toni comics, written and illustrated by Angel, that appeared in Cross-Talk in the late 1980s and early 1990s. Thus began our 5-year journey of trying to acquire a copy.

After tracking down a copy in a different library (and subsequently being turned down when we asked if they could digitize it so we could check it out) eventually we discovered that Kym, the original publisher, had an online presence. So we contacted her to see if there was any chance that she might possibly still have a copy. This was in April of 2020, just as we were mostly staying at home for the foreseeable future.The Toni Compendium cover

After sending the initial email, we waited a couple of days, and she got back to us to let us know that, in fact, she had had the foresight at some point to take the remaining issues of Cross-Talk and bundle up whole collections – not a complete run, but a lot – including The Toni Compendium, and pack them away. Unfortunately, the bundled collections were in their storage space, and it would be a little bit until she could get to them. So far, so awesome!

And then life happened, the pandemic shifted, time marched forward, etc. etc. We hadn’t forgotten about it, but as is always the case, we at QZAP are usually juggling several projects at once, and we figured we’d get back to this eventually. Also, with COVID being in play, we had no idea how it effected Kym or her folk.
Fast forward to February, 2023. Kym reached out to us to say that she had finally gotten access to where the Cross-Talk bundles were stored, and did we still want a set? We jumped on it, to say the least. After a couple more emails back-and-fort, the PayPaling of postage fees, and a few severe weather incidents, and they were as good as shipped.

Thus concludes the long and maybe-not-that-interesting story of how we came to finally possess a copy of this long-sought comic book about a teenage trans woman.

Cover for Khen-Draa, Transgender Warrior comicAs an added bonus, there also was a copy of Khen-Draa, Transgender Warrior, from 1995 by Kym and Beppi. But that’s another blog post.

As of this publishing, we haven’t had a chance to get to digitizing these comics, but we’ll update when we do.

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